Isn’t it great when a relationship is going smoothly. You’re so in love with each other and you smile just thinking about the special person in your life. Then it happens! Seemingly out of nowhere, your partner tells you they want to break up.
You are in shock and feel the sting of the words.
After thinking about it, you start to realize you missed some of the warning signs.
Even worse, you start blaming yourself. I know it’s tough, I’ve been there many times.
But, believe it or not, there really is an answer to the question of how to deal with a breakup. It can be can be nearly impossible to let go. If this sounds like you and you want to feel better, then what follows will help.
Okay, okay! I know…after a breakup everybody wants to give you advice. And they all say the same thing. the problem is that they don’t get what you’re going through.
At least that’s the impression you get. Either way, their words don’t provide any measure of comfort, and you still feel awful.
Counselors and relationship experts have helped countless people get through their breakups.
This experience has taught them what works and what doesn’t.
Of course, in your state of mind, it can be difficult to accept what they say. However, they truly can help.
So even if you don’t believe it will work, give it a try and act as though you could believe it will work.
The first thing you must do is stop blaming yourself. To be honest, there may have been things you did that contributed to the break up, or maybe not. Either way, there is no way you are 100% responsible, especially if you had no idea it was coming.
This may be a tough thought to swallow, but there is the possibility that the other person never really loved you.
They may have said they did, but over time people’s feelings change, or they realize what they thought was love was something else.
Don’t take this to heart. If this is the case, then it was just a matter of time anyway. Far better for such a relationship to end sooner rather than later.
Missing the other person is understandable, but not to the point of obsession.
It’s critical that you carry on living your life, no matter how hard it is. Staying active will help keep your thoughts in the present moment, thereby minimizing the time you think about the past.
You can’t force somebody else to love you. And to try to force them isn’t fair to them or you. You deserve to love, and you deserve to be loved. Your ex wasn’t that person. Now you know. Now you can move on.
Take some time to readjust emotionally.
If you get into a new relationship too quickly you run the risk of not thinking clearly and ending up in an situation that’s much worse. Sadly, there are people in the world who prey on those who are emotionally fragile.
And after a breakup you will be in that state. Give yourself some time to return to some sense of normalcy before you start dating again.
It sounds like a cliche, but it’s true: there is somebody out there for you.
The person you broke up with wasn’t that person, and now you can scratch them off the list. Next! That’s how to deal with a breakup.